(Listing of Children’s Birth & Death Dates)

Those at the National Office know that it is a parents desire to hear their child’s name spoken and to see it in print. The Identity Theft Resource Center has cited many examples of identity theft of children who have passed away. They are asking that that the full date of a child’s birth or death is not listed on our website or in our newsletter. It is the responsibility of the Compassionate Friends organization to protect their members to the best of their ability. To honor this request, we are not posting the day of our children’s death in our newsletter. We appreciate your understanding of this request in order to protect our children.

For more information about Compassionate Friends, visit TCF’s national site at www.compassionatefriends.org.

                                              
                                               Featured Children Stories

Leonard Yoder
In 2002, our son Leonard moved to Milbank, SD where he worked for a hay farmer. At about 10:00 PM on July 2nd, 2006 we received a phone call that would change our lives forever. The man introduced himself as the Grant Co., SD coroner, and his next words are imprinted into my mind indelibly…"Mr. Yoder, I have some very sad news for you- your son has taken his life". After a long, sleepless night, we drove the two hours to Milbank, despite the fact that my driving skills were a bit risky, at best. We searched the apartment for any notes or clues, finding nothing. We spent the day making arrangements at the funeral home for an evening visitation there, and stopped at other places to take care of his banking, etc.. We found a very caring, compassionate community. They all had a good word for "Lenny" as he was known there. At the viewing at Milbank, many people showed up and said things like, "he was like a son to me", or,"he was like a brother to me", or, "we baled hay together', or, "he was in our young adult Bible Study". He had even far more friends than we realized. Later we passed out memory sheets to his friends and acquaintances, and after they all came back, we put them into a folder. We were overwhelmed at the amazing legacy he left to the lives he touched. Many people have told us since, “you may never know how much good will come from this”, and we know they mean it well, but my first reaction is always, "that is all well and good, but why do we have to pay the price for that good to happen?” The truth is, we don't know, but we have learned in a new way to put the past, present, and future into the hands of a wise, loving God, who sees the beginning and the end. The last time I spoke to Leonard was when he called me on Fathers' Day. We visited a while, then closed the conversation like usual, with him saying, " Hey, I love you, Dad", and I said," Leonard, I love you, too". Those words, also, are indelibly etched into my memory, and always a reminder that we never know when we say our last words to each other. 
                                                                                                                   ~ Dad, Marcus Yoder
      
Rebekah Joramo
Rebekah was born in October of 1983 to Steve and Ruth Joramo. She was born in Litchfield, MN, and lived in Grove City all of her life with her older sister and parents. She graduated from ACGC class of 2002. She was Grove City Royalty princess 2000-2001. She was a fun filled girl and everyone she met, young or old, you were part of her family. Becky went on after graduation to college to the University of Wisconsin - Superior. There she went into the Social Work program. She graduated from UW-S in 2006 and went to work for the State of MN at Moose Lake in the Sex Offenders program. She loved every minute of it. She came home in November of 2008 and told us the news that she was expecting. Rebekah asked me if I would go with her to her 1st ultra-sound and I said yes. So, Becky’s sister and I went to Duluth with her to the first ultra-sound thinking that all we would see is a little bloop on the screen. Instead, we saw a full sized baby. Becky had mis-calculated. We were happy and everything from there on moved quite quickly. Becky was very precise, she had everything in order from the time she could take off of work to her daycare. She was in excellent health and so was the baby, it was little girl. Becky had a doctor’s appointment on January 23. She called me at work several times that day and told me that she got her haircut, went out for lunch with a girlfriend, and then had a doctor’s appointment. The doctor said everything was fine with her and the baby. On Saturday January 24th, which was my birthday, she called in the morning and wished me a happy birthday and told me of a few things she needed for the baby. I went shopping and about 4:30 I called her and told her what I had picked up. We had a nice conversion, said our goodbyes and we love yous, and I said I would talk to her on Monday after her doctor’s appointment when I got home from work. When I got home from work, there on the answering machine, was a call from her doctor saying that she didn't show up for her appointment. That was not Becky. I called her cell phone several times and got her voicemail. At midnight I got the call from the Moose Lake police saying that they found my Becky dead in her bedroom. She was not a pretty sight. She lay there for some time and we had to cremate her and the baby. So now, Becky and Chloe are in heaven looking down on us every day. We miss both of you.
                                                                                  ~ Dad and Mom, Steve and Ruth Jaramo


In memory of …
Dustin L Johnson, age 22, is survived by his parents: Jodi and Denise Johnson of Lake Lillian, his sister Jacinda Johnson, his son Kaiden, his special friend Kristi Nietfeld of St Cloud; his maternal grandparents: Harold and Nancy Kiecker of Lake Lillian, his paternal grandparents: Dale Johnson of Lake Lillian and Joan Johnson of Hutchinson; Aunts:  Dorie (Kiecker) and Dale Larsen of Willmar, Dawn (Kiecker) and Rick Rogney of Glencoe, Dawn (Johnson) and Scott Danielson of Willmar; Uncles: Robbie and Nicole Johnson of Woodbury, Toni Johnson of Brooklyn Park; several cousins and many friends.


Todd Hermann
Todd was born in December of 1971. He was a big baby at 9 lbs 5 oz and grew to be a big man at 6’ 5” with a good foundation of a size 16 shoe. He was a very typical little boy loving his trucks, cars, tractor and playing whatever his dad was doing on the farm. He would spend hours in his sandbox. He was an easy child to raise never causing us problems or worry. He loved the farm and was always eager to help when needed. He did well in school, was a boy’s state alternate National Honor Society member, co-captain of his senior football team, honor student, and was active in his 4-H Club and church. After graduation he attended Thief River Falls Technical School receiving his aviation maintenance degree and then to Hutchinson Technical College to get his Non-Destructive Testing degree. He worked in Quality Control at Lazer Machining Co. at Sommerset, WI. He was married to Shelly in September of 1996. Nine months to the day our lives were forever changed. Todd and Shelly were coming home from an afternoon of Volleyball, riding on their Harley Davidson, when 2 deer came up from the ditch. He tried to avoid the deer and the bike flipped. Todd was killed instantly and Shelly was badly hurt. She was 7 weeks pregnant, carried the baby for two months and then lost it June 14 ending Todd’s dream for his loving family, his coming home to farm with dad and to live a long and happy life. June of 1997 ended out dreams for our family. We think of the grandchildren there would have been, how he would have loved being an uncle to Tami’s children, how different holidays would have been. We miss his big smile, the dry humor, and big hugs. Compassionate Friends has been our lifeline for this grief journey. We have only missed a few meeting over all these years and know we need the love and support of our friends to make it through another month.  ~ Bob and Betty Hermann

Jeffrey Lee Grau

Jeff’s story begins with a phone call from the Children’s Home Society in December of  1977. We had adopted a daughter 5 years earlier, and had been praying that we would be able to adopt another child---and hopefully a son.  We had moved into a new house in 1977, and Julie, our daughter, kept telling people that the blue bedroom was for her baby brother.  We sort of held our breath when she’d say that because we weren’t guaranteed that another child would be available for us nor would it be a male child. But Julie’s prediction came true, and on December 10, 1977, we did indeed bring home her baby brother.  Jeff was an adorable child at 5 months old with lots of dark brown hair and brown eyes.  We truly felt that he was a gift from God sent to us that Christmas. Jeff was a happy, smiley child, who grew up loving cars, liked and played football, and was also on the swim team. However, when he was in 9^th grade, we started noticing changes.  He came to me one day after school, and said, “Mom, I think I have clinical depression.”  He had done some research and described some of the symptoms he was experiencing.  We immediately set up some appointment to have him diagnosed and the doctors did indeed diagnose that he was suffering from clinical depression.  That was a very difficult year for us, and it was finally decided that Jeff would probably respond better to concentrated counseling and living in an environment that knew how to deal with his mood swings, etc.  So, for 9 months, Jeff lived at Booth Brown House in St. Paul.  He returned home in the fall of 1995, enrolled in alternative school, and got a part-time job.  Things weren’t perfect, but we were glad that he was home with us again and were hopeful that his treatment had given him the skills to combat any suicidal thoughts.  However, on a very cold, snowy December 11^th, Jeff ate the evening meal with us, and without appearing upset or without giving us any clue, he went to his bedroom and hung himself.  Just 18 short years and one day from the time we so excitedly brought him home to be part of our family, Jeff returned to his heavenly Father.  We were heartbroken and still do not understand why he chose to leave us so abruptly.  December will always bring us some sadness, but we have been able to finally find peace in his decision.  We are thankful that God lent us Jeff to love as ours for 18 years and he will remain in our hearts forever!    
~ Lee and Carol Grau